I am seriously THE worst at confrontation. I can't believe that for a large chunk of my college career I had every intention of being a lawyer. Following any rebuttal I would switch sides immediately, possibly before the end of the rebuttal. It doesn't help that my definition of 'confrontation' is incredibly broad, “Any situation in which my opinion could affect another person's mood in a slightly unfavorable way.” If that sounds like it knocks out pretty much all human interactions, it's because it does.
It is especially bad with people I will have to continue to see regularly. I basically volunteered to get paid less in my most recent nannying job. When the mom posed the lingering question, “we paid our old nanny $____ (you didn't really think I would let you know how balling my paycheck is, did you?), but, I mean, obviously, you would want $____ (two dollars more)...” I basically cut her off, saying, “let's just meet in the middle!” A completely unnecessary backdown. It would have been like a boxer retreating to their corner when being shown the venue.
A big reason I jumped at the chance for a smaller paycheck was because her old nanny had gotten me the job and I didn't want her to somehow find out I was being paid more, because who KNOWS what kind of confrontation that would have led to. After I hung up the phone, I thought, well that didn't go well. That is not how anyone in the history of ever having a job would have wanted that to go. But maybe I came off as really agreeable, affordable and flexible? Meanwhile I'm sure after the mom hung up the phone, she thought, well, the good news is she accepted the job, the bad news is I think she's retarded.
I'm sure my parents will be pleased to read that I consider it a confrontation to not give someone my phone number when they ask for it. While I would have no desire to see this person ever again, I would also have no desire to awkwardly think of a reason and possibly face the wrath of an upset stranger, someone who has just suffered from love at first sight. The result is some interesting additions to my phone contacts, including “Smilie Jack” and “DE'Playa.” The realist in me had to fight the anti confronter in me over asking if these were their birth names.
Despite being overly nice and agreeing to give these men my phone number, ice runs through my veins shortly after and I don't answer any phone calls or text messages, which I'm sure upsets, if not completely destroys, these men. The other day my roommate told me a girl he was interested in blatantly lied when he asked her out, I told him she handled that flawlessly because I just would have never answered. He preached that we should all just be honest with each other and when I saw how strongly he felt about this, I realized that when it comes to matters of the heart, my attempts to avoid confrontation end up affecting other people. Which, according my definition, would make my avoidance of confrontation a confrontation in itself. But what is the alternative? An actual confrontation? No, thanks!
But here is ONE thing I will confront people about and is my new project being live on kickstarter for donations RIGHT NOW! That means, as you read this, you could be throwing anywhere from 1 dollar to 1 million dollars to a pretty sweet project. Well, unless you are really behind in my posts, or reading through old ones to relive some happier times, and the kickstarter has already expired. But that wouldn't be the reality unless it was after MARCH 19, 2012. That's right, you have until MARCH 19, 2012 to donate to Educated on kickstarter and help make a really fun project happen! If you enjoy my awkward interactions in writing, you will love them acted out by hilarious and talented actors in a sitcom. So check out www.iameducated.com and throw a few dollars if you like what you see!
FUN FACT ABOUT THIS POST: I wrote the word “confrontation” or “confront” 10 times!
No comments:
Post a Comment