A Not So Pleasant Discovery

Yesterday I woke up to discover that someone had thrown up on my car door handle. After the immediate disgust, I went through a series of reactions. At first I was surprised, I had lived in Boulder for four years and this had never happened to my good ol’ CR-V (better known as Black Beauty). I found it much more probable that my car would have been disgraced in the student run circus that is Boulder, CO than the quaint residential area in which I currently live. After the surprise came the excitement. There was, at some point, a person in close proximity to my vehicle that partied, a quality I have been searching for in a friend this whole summer. Where was this person hiding? How would I find them? DNA test the remnants they left behind? I was willing to look past the throw up on my car if they were willing to invite me to their next event. This excitement was quickly replaced by the harsh reality of the situation. Did I reallllly want to hang out with this person? They clearly can’t hold their alcohol.